Ok, buckle your safety belts people….
I spend the majority of my day thinking about the messages our church communicates.
And this blog, although a bit varied in content, is basically an exploration of things I’m learning, sharing of best practices I’ve picked up, and highlights different things I’ve found to be helpful… my passion is about what we say and how we choose to say it.
What are we saying?
I think if you had to sum up the core of the Church’s message… not just my church, your church, their church, but THE CHURCH, the core of our message is simple… we are called to communicate a message of love and compassion. Grace and forgiveness. Hope and restoration. Life abundant in Christ. We are to tell the truth of who God is, His Word and draw people to experience the life with God in Christ we are meant to know.
It’s really pretty simple.
When people asked Jesus what the greatest commandment was He made it pretty simple:
“‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”
That is what we are called do as we communicate the message of the Gospel.
It is simple but we can spend a lifetime learning to understand what it means to love God and be in relationship with Him and to understand how to love and be in relationship with our neighbors, the people around us and those who we are living life with. I recently heard Dave Gibbons so profoundly say that oftentimes, those “neighbors” are often people who are completely different than us.
So all that being said… what do you think is the first thing that comes to mind when people outside of the church think about the Church?
Some not so great words probably come to mind.
We’ve done a poor job of communicating and living out what is our most vital message. And too often our love for God has turned to being a religious routine and the way we’ve tried to show our neighbor love has been in by telling them they are wrong and don’t know the God we know and that they need to change.
We’ve missed it.
As I’ve heard many people say lately… we, as the Church, are oftentimes known more for what are against than what we are for…. Our truth hasn’t be drenched in compassion.
And you don’t have to be an expert to know that people’s view of the Church is declining in a not-so-great direction… and one of the hot button issues is how the church is responding to the gay community.
A few years ago I met a guy named Andrew Marin.
I had heard a little bit about him from some different people and was so excited to meet up with him and hear his vision… he had this wild idea of building bridges between the Church and the gay community.
Woah. Really?
I didn’t know what to expect when I met him, but I was completely blown away by his heart and the ministry God has given him.
I won’t you all of his story, but he basically described himself as being a “Bible bashing homophobe….” But all of that changed, radically.
Sometimes we have inaccurate perceptions of different people groups or situations and it’s not until we’re actually confronted with it in the form of someone we know or love (a neighbor), that we have to confront our own prejudice, misconceptions or misunderstandings.
Three of Andrew’s closest friends came out to him as being gay, and it rocked his world. Now homosexuality had a face to him… his friends.
He struggled to know how to respond, how to be their friend, or what to do… and quickly learned that instead of talking (or preaching) that he needed to listen.
So Andrew did something crazy. He moved to Boystown, Chicago’s gay neighborhood, and lived among the gay community. He didn’t have an agenda, only to listen, to learn and to figure out what he could do.
The experience was life-changing and he came out of that experience with a message… a message that I think EVERY church leader needs to hear… and it’s not an easy one, it’s messy, it’s complicated, but while the church has been so focused on changing people Andrew would contend that maybe the Church needs to change.
We need to change our perceptions. We need to change our message. We need to stop talking and start listening when it comes to this issue, because behind every person there’s a story that needs to be heard. And you won’t know how to reach out and make a difference if you are just going by what you think or what you believe… do you know your gay neighbors? Do you know their story?
I know this is a tough and very emotional issue for many people, but Church, we’ve got to get this one right.
When the gay community hears the word “church” or “Christians” the first image that pops into their mind is this…
Now, I know most of you would agree those people are crazy (and they are!), and that they don’t accurately portray who Christians are or our message. They are an extreme.
But you know what? Their message is a lot louder than ours. Where are the people with Jesus Loves You signs? Because I think we’d all agree, God does love them just like He loves each one of us.
While it might be unfair for all Christians to be lumped into this category, I guarantee 9 or 10 times, this is the image that comes to people’s minds.
So let me ask you… what’s the first image that pops into your mind when you think of the gay community?
I’m sure it’s not an accurate one, either.
We’ve all got a lot to learn from each other.
And that definitely creates a lot of tension.
One of the coolest experiences I’ve had over the past year or so is engaging in a conversation Andrew hosts called “Living in the Tension”… it’s a group that meets twice a month to discuss all of this stuff.
People from all sorts of backgrounds, beliefs, orientations, religious convictions, and denominations are a part of it… there’s straight people, gay people, confused people, you name it… and we all check what we believe at the door and simply listen to people’s stories, discuss our thoughts and feelings, and try to model what it means to truly love (and understand) our neighbor while loving God and wanting to serve Him.
It’s definitely changed my perception and view and helped me to see that love really is an orientation. I’ve met some of the most incredible people, I’ve heard stories that would break your heart and others that would make you rage… but in the end, I’ve seen how true, loving community can make an impact and be a place of hope and healing.
I challenge you to get a copy of Andrew’s book, Love is an Orientation: Elevating the Conversation with the Gay Community… and to read it, pray, and ask God to open your eyes and your heart to how you and your church should respond and engage with the gay community.
Andrew was in Irvine, California, this past weekend speaking at Dave Gibbons’ church, he spoke on Proverbs 16:-1-7. It’s a challenging message and I encourage you to take the time to check it out.
Thanks for hearing me out on this one people, I know it’s a hard subject to tackle, but seriously, at the end of the day, the greatest message we can all communicate is one of God’s love, His grace, and compassion.
Love is orientation of our hearts… our hearts in alignment with His, seeing people and seeing the world around us through His eyes… loving and calling people to God’s embrace.
I’ll close with this reminder for all of us…
It’s the Holy Spirit’s job to convict, God’s job to judge, and my job to love everyone.
What message are you communicating?
