One-size-fits-all doesn’t work when it comes to managing the human side of an organization. People come in different personality types, some requiring a specific leadership approach. Who deserves continued investment and who doesn’t? Can you turn someone’s performance around? Here’s the danger: if you don’t know how to deal differently with different kinds of people—especially the difficult ones—they can derail your entire vision. Drawing on the wisdom of 20 years of coaching top business and church leaders, Dr. Cloud presents concepts that can expand your capacity for accurately assessing and managing each person on your team. “These leadership concepts,” says Bill Hybels, “have forever changed the way I lead.”
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- Every leader has “this guy…”
- Wherever you are, God has called you to be a steward over a vision for the specific reason of changing something.
- Will you allow “this guy” to stop your vision from moving forward?
What Does a Person Do When the TRUTH Comes To Them?
- What does a person do when reality comes to them?
- All systems of leadership will tell you one of the biggest first tasks of a leader is to discover what the reality is.
- Where your maturity isn’t strong enough to do something, add external structure.
- Feedback is not easy to hear sometimes.
- We make assumptions as leaders.
- We are kind and responsible, but when someone gives us feedback we listen.
- We take feedback and adjust, are thankful for it and get better.
- The problem is that we lead like that and think that other people are like us, too.
- Not everybody is the same, therefore you cannot deal with every person you lead the same.
- Diagnose who you’re talking to and deal with them appropriately.
3 Categories of People: Wise, Fools, and Evil
1 – Wise
- When the light comes to them, they adjust themselves to match the light.
- When the truth comes to them, they change.
- Correct a wise person and he will be wiser still.
- When you confront them, they smile.
- They thank you for correction/feedback.
- A righteous man will strike me and it will be a blessing. – David
- Talk to wise people. Talking helps because someone is listening.
- Coach them.
- Give feedback.
- Resource them.
- Leadership Challenge with the Wise: Make sure they are a match for what you need.
- Keep them challenged appropriately.
2 – Fools
- A fool may be the smartest and most gifted person around the table.
- They are where they are because of what they do and who they are.
- BUT, when the light comes they adjust the light.
- They are allergic to the light and try to dim it.
- They try to adjust the truth.
- They excuse it.
- They minimize it.
- Or, they shoot the messenger.
- “If you would just…”
- They deny that it’s reality.
- They externalize it.
- They aren’t happy when they get feedback… and get angry.
- They have meetings after meetings.
- One of the most important feelings you can have as a leader is hopelessness.
- A nice, responsible leader has hope that a fool will start listening.
- You’ve got to get hopeless.
- Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting results.
- Do not confront or correct a fool, lest you incur insults upon yourself. [shoot the messenger]
- Stop talking… they’ve stopped the vision.
- You’re no longer in charge of the mission.
- Your job as the leader is to take stewardship over the vision and stop the insanity.
- Stop talking.
- Talk about the problem that talking about problems doesn’t work.
- Take the talk above the weeds and talk about the pattern.
- Express your hopelessness.
- When you’re hopeless, you’ve got to protect the vision.
- Stop talking about the issues and start talking about the issue.
- Set limits.
- Limit your exposure to problems.
- You cannot afford to lose much more.
- This is where you can get soft and loving.
- Maybe they are foolish because of reasons related to shame and insecurity.
- People want feedback in different ways. Find a way that works.
- Define how you should give them feedback.
- Next, ask “What will we do if I do what you want and nothing changes?”
- That’s when you can get specific about the consequences.
- Fools change when the pain of not changing is greater than the pain of changing.
- There is great hope for fools.
- It takes guts to do what leadership requires when you’re dealing with a fool.
- Leadership Challenge: Limit your exposure. Be clear about the consequences. Give them a choice. Follow through.
3 – Evil
- Have destruction in their heart.
- They want to inflict pain.
- You’ve got to believe that there are truly bad people in the world.
- Reject a divisive person after a second warming.
- We have to go into protection mode with evil people.
God has called you to lead people.
- It’s not always about the plan but getting the people to work the plan.
- Take the leadership challenge to not let someone’s character problem stop the mission God has called you to from moving forward.

